Best Brady Bunch Fantasy Football Player
By: deckardt | Categories: Family Fantasy Sports, Fantasy Football
Family Fantasy Sports tweeted yesterday asking “Which Brady Bunch cast member would be the best at fantasy football? U can include Alice and Sam.” It caught my attention, and I thought I would take a shot at the question. Head to the bottom of the article if you cannot wait for my reply.
First, who it could not be.
Judging by the fact that Sam could not figure out for all those years that Alice was interested in him, I know that Sam was not too perceptive. His ability to anticipate breakout stars and players past their prime would be his downfall in fantasy football. He is the guy who would draft Amani Toomer to be his second wide receiver.
Next, Mike and Carol Brady. As the adults, some would consider them the front runners. However, their inability to say no the kids and consequently would trade away their best players to the kids. While this may mean they are loving parents, it will be their fantasy football downfall.
Bobby Brady was the biggest football fan out of the all Bradys. Remember when he played catch with Joe Namath in the backyard, that was awesome. Unfortunately, Bobby’s homerism would hurt him in his draft as he would pass on guys like Johnny Unitas and Bart Starr in order to draft his beloved Namath.
When it comes to Marcia, you have to wonder if she would even play fantasy football. It just does not seem like something that would be on her radar. Between combing her hair and writing letters to Davy Jones, I do not think she would even enter a league. Honestly, I think she might actually be the best fantasy football player of the bunch if she chose to play.
Contenders for the title
Greg, as the groovy big brother, exudes tons of confidence that he is good at just about anything he does. As it turns out, he probably would be good at fantasy football. Unfortunately, as his attention seemed to turn from one fad to another each week, Greg would quickly disappear from league activity, and would not make a move after Week 3.
Peter has all the tools to be a great fantasy football player. He gets sports and he is pretty smart. But, he has one big issue: teenage girls. He is simply not going to be able to put the time in to focus on his team, because his attention will be on how to get some groovy baby to go the next dance with him.
Alice is perpetual fantasy football playoff threat. She knows how to run a house, so assembling a potent offense should be a walk in the park for her. Unfortunately, she always seems to avoid taking risks (see: Sam), and would never take a chance on a guy about to breakout. Her fantasy teams would be solid, but never championship caliber.
Cindy Brady might be the best instinctive fantasy football player in the whole bunch. You knew how whenever she suspected something, she shied away and protected Kitty Carryall. That sixth sense would protect her from picking up duds or making bad deals. With a few more years, she may emerge as the best in the fantasy football player in the bunch.
The Best Brady Bunch Fantasy Football Player is…
Jan. Why is she the best Brady at fantasy football? She has glasses, she has to be smart, right? How about because of her keen (albeit, obsessive) observation skills, such as noticing that everything is about Marcia! Marcia! Marcia! Her obsessiveness will help guide her to fantasy football victory–she’ll have no friends–but, she will be the fantasy football champion.
What do you think of my analysis, and who would you pick?
Note: I have not included Cousin Oliver, because let’s face it, he was only on the show because Cindy and Bobby were no longer cute and cuddly. I bet his last name is not even Brady.








